The Flamer

spatula

1994

TTTO: The Boxer by Paul Simon and Art Garfunkel

       
I am just a lurker tho my story's seldom told,
I have squandered my commitments for a terminal and access,
     such are Usenetters
All flames and jest, 
Still a man reads what he wants to read and killfiles the rest.

When I started reading newsgroups I was no more than a boy
In the company of newbies, in the quiet of the on-line helpfiles,
     running scared
Confused as hell,
Seeking out the stupid keystrokes all you gurus knew so well,
Looking for alt.tv.saved-by-the-bell.


CHORUS:
Li li li (FLAME!)
Li li li li li li li,
Li li li (FLAME!)
Li li li li li li li li li li li.
(repetive lil' sucker ain't it?!)

Asking frequently-asked questions, I come looking for a file
But I get no answers,
Just a come-on from the gang on alt.hi.are.you.cute
I do declare
There were times when I was so bored I read the posts up there

(instrumental)
(chorus)

Now I'm sending this across the world, and costing the net hundreds
     (if not thousands)
Of dollars, do I really want to be doing this?
Doing this....
What the hell.

In the carrel types a flamer and an idiot by his trade,
And he carries the reminders of every piece of hate e-mail that he got
Till he cries out, in his anger and his shame,
"I am leaving, you all suck", but we flame him just the same

(chorus)
(chorus)
(repeat chorus until you feel the song should be over.)
(repeat it again just to make sure.)